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i wish you would let me love you. i think we would be great together. maybe in another life

I will always love you my wifey… Bye aliy😊

whats for lunch

wonderful experience. never want it again. thank you.

I noticed how much you wanted that link bouquet for Valentine’s Day and how yellow is your color (according to your last tweet). Hence the yellow background and the bouquet. But giving it to you on val’s day felt off because I don’t only appreciate you on one specific day. I cherish you every day. So I saved it for your level-up day, which I think is special in its own way. Happy birthday to you, Shayla. I’ve never felt this secure having a friend like you. Someone who can match everyone’s energy, who always listens to my nags, and who I think never even gets mad at me. Not at me, not at anyone. I’ve never seen you be a hater toward someone else and I truly adore you for that. Please keep all your kind traits for a long time, ya? I also noticed that you’re more of a words of affirmation person, so I tried to put this into words even though expressing feelings isn’t really my strong suit. That’s also why I didn’t prepare anything more than this. As for the gift… how about a “watch-together” pass you can redeem anytime? I’ll adjust, no worries. Just tell me the date since it’s your present hehe :D Last one note, I sincerely hope you get to spend today surrounded by people you love. Eat something good, dress up as pretty as you always do, and be happy. I hope you’re having a great day and that turning 21 means absolutely nothing but fun 🤟🏻 Sincerely, Keano

You don’t know me and I don’t know you

Yaa… maybe first letter complete chesake ekkadiki vachav anukuntunna. I hope adhi chadivina time lo you felt okay. Ela endhuku chepthunnano… you’ll understand by the end of this letter. Shall we start? 💔 Nijanga naku teliyadu nuvvu naku intha important avthav ani. Adhi naku oka morning lo ardham ayyindhi 🥲 Na phone lo na tears chusinappudu… while I was texting you. Appudu realize ayyanu — idhi just normal attachment kaadhu ani. “What I’m for you?” ane question ki nee answer ento naku teliyadu. Kani okati matram clear — nuvvu just another friend kaadhu naaku. After many days… ela nanu nen chusa. I’m not blaming you for that. Maybe it’s my fault. “Why you?” ani adigav. What do you think my answer will be? Nuvvu look good kabatti aa? Leda ninnu advantage ga teesukovali ani aa? 🙂 If adhe reason ayithe… nuvvu nannu adiginappude “ok” cheppochu ga. Endhuku ala cheyaledhu antav? 🤔 Leda… ninnu use cheskundham ani anukuntunna ani feel avtunnava? If adhe nuvvu feel avtunte… ee antha chadavalsina avasaram ledu. Direct ga block cheyachu. Leda neeku comfortable anipinchina decision thisko. Kani okati matram sure — nuvvu matladuthunna vadu aa type kaadhu 🙃 Sudden ga ila adigadu enti ani anukoku… naku reason undhi anduke adiganu. Just 1 day back varaku niku nachindhi. Ippudu uncomfortable ani feel avtunnav. Ni imagination lo unna varaku adhi okay. Kani adhi nenu avvagane… uncomfortable aipoyinda? Ok… let’s come to main point. Nen nitho build cheskuna connection all of a sudden oka night lo create avaledhu. You too know that manam entha varaku travel avadaniki entha time pattindho. I have not planned it. Because naku nv evaro kuda complete ga teliyadu when we started this journey. We crossed so many stages… and we are here now. Entha dhuram travel chesam ante — okarni okaru kavali anukune antha. At least 2 days mundhu varaku niku adhe feel undedhi. Now… nv same feel avtunnava ledha anadhi niku mathrame telusu. I’m truly asking you — If you feel something for me, say it clearly. If you don’t, say that clearly too. Chala easy ga “let’s be just friends” antunnav. But let’s have some clarity on that. Do you really think we can suddenly act like nothing happened? Do you think manam limits lo undagalama after everything we shared? “Just friends” ante simple word kaadhu. Because what we had was never “just friendship” level lo undaledhu. Midnight talks… emotional dependence… jealousy… care… future gurinchi subtle hints… Ivanni jarigaka sudden ga normal friendship mode ki velladam practical aa? Here also I’m not asking you to be in a relationship with me. Kani okariki okaru feelings unde situation lo “just friends” ani compromise avvadam adhi healthy kaadhu. Nuvvu clarity tho “I don’t see you that way” ante nenu accept chestha. Kani feelings ni ignore chesi safe option ga “friends” ani settle avvadam matram naku ok kaadhu. So nenu adigedhi okkate — Is that truly what you want? Leda adhi easy answer kabatti chepthunnava? So before saying “let’s be just friends” ask yourself one thing — Is that really what you want? Or is it just the safest option ? Yaa i think it's enough to understand what's my stand on you ... And I hope malli ela rase need ledhu anukuntuna 🫂 i hope you understand this too like how you understand me 🥺 And chepa ga you will get it on end of the latter 🫠 Here it is i don't want to do it but I have to Epudu edhi cheyakapothe enka epudu elane vuntam anipisthadhi ... Like how we are from last 2 days Naku nitho quality time spend cheyali ani vundhi ... Not like how we are from last 2 days. Idk what this lead's to but I have to do it Over think chesthuna anukoku ... Chala alochinche edhantha chepa For this reason ... Nv adigina space niku edham anukuntuna 🫂 don't take me wrong and tittukoku .. but just for 3 days or until you feel ok 🥺 Sorry velipothunandhuku .. jagrathaga nana 🫶 Don't think I just don't care about your texts... I'm here for you always and now I just miss us , 😞

I honestly didn’t think malli ila oka letter rayalsina time vasthundani 🥲 After that first one, I really believed we’d go back to how we used to be. But… no. Chala chepav. So let’s address one by one. First… “I don’t deserve this” ani matladadam stop chey. Nuvvu a context lo ela antunnavo naku nijanga ardham kaledu. Nuvvu enduku ala feel avtunnavo teliyadu. Kani nenu “I’m serious” ani cheppinappudu — adhi casual ga, flow lo, leda emotion lo cheppaledu. Nuvvu deserve aa kaadha ane vishayam kaadhu issue. Issue enti ante — nuvvu clarity tho lekapovadam. Confusion ni handle cheyyagalanu. Distance ni kuda manage cheyyagalanu. Kani uncertainty matram kastam. “You deserve better” ani chepi velipodam easy option naku . But Clarity ivvadam — adhe real maturity. Next… “Why only me?” ani adigav. “Why only you?” ante… nijanga naku clear answer ledu. - Adhi tharvatha matladukundham. But “Why not others?” — let’s talk about that. Nenu evaritho matladina andharu same avvaru. Yes, naku chala friends unnaru, Close people kuda unnaru. Kani andhartho same type of bond undadhu ga? Right? Connection ante random ga create avvadhu. It doesn’t happen just because we talk daily. It doesn’t happen just because we’re comfortable. Nuvvu different kabatti nenu serious ga unna. Nuvvu important kabatti nenu clarity adugutunna. If you were just “one more person” in that list of friends, nenu ee conversation kuda start cheyyaledu. “You notice small things, I feel happy” annav. Honestly… naku chala happy anipinchindhi. At least nenu ninnu care chesthunna ani nuvvu ardham chesukunnav. “But I’m stuck… choosing my life. Correct decision thiskuntunnana? Leda wrong way velthunnana?” annav. See… Decision correct aa wrong aa ani immediate ga evaru cheppaleru. Not me. Not even top rankers or most successful people. - Time matrame answer istundi. Kani okati matram cheppagalanu — idhi workout ayithe… “Not every man is the same” ani nenu prove cheyalanukunna. Force ga kaadhu. Words tho kaadhu. Consistency tho. But before all that… oka question neeku neevu adugu Nuvvu fear tho decide chesthunava? Leda clarity tho? Yaa i think I have addressed everything ... Maybe niku kavalsina answers dhorikay Anukunta 🥲 And in next one let's talk about my side my point of view 🫶

dear dejuan… idk how to start this tbh.. its been two months since we’ve broken up, it now being february. and here i am, finally laying out all my feelings to you. through out the whole relationship, i honestly felt like the love we shared wasnt real. i couldn’t find it in my heart to trust you nor open up to you. i was scared of getting hurt or being left behind again, scared of actually hoping for forever just for it to be temporary. i vowed to never let you in, to keep my guard up, to limit what I say and how i communicate with you. i lied about not liking to go to sleep on the phone because i knew if i did, my guard will slowly go down. i stuck to harsh words,dry texts, late text and rage baiting because i feared my love would be too much for you. the constant texting and calling, the pet names and constant annoyance, the random facts and anime quotes throughout the day, the stalking you and your family and friends accounts, the getting upset over everything that you do and refusing to tell you because of the fear that im over reacting or upsetting you, the spamming “baby” just to respond with hi, or stalking your ig and who you text. i feared actually being myself. i feared texting you constantly even when all i could think of was you because i feared being too much for you. i feared losing you.i even feared you leaving me for your bsf because of how close you guys were. and while focusing on every possible way to keep a fair enough distance, without knowing it, i was damaging myself physically and mentally. i slowly started to feel empty inside. like a moving corpse without a beating heart. i felt so lost and alone and i didn’t know how to talk to anyone. i didn’t even know how to explain my feelings. i deeply loved you so so much but i couldn’t feel it. it was more of a thought than a feeling. i then started to think that maybe everything I once felt was all just in my head, and suddenly every other feeling ive once felt was slipping away. the happiness, love, joy, sadness, hurt, depression, overthinking. it just all slowly stopped. and the next thing i know i was in the same cycle over and over, feeling like a puppet being moved around. i felt hallow. i felt like i was running on air pilote. i couldn’t find the energy to talk to you or anyone. i felt disassociated with the world. and all i had was weed. i started smoking and sleeping heavily, staring at a blank wall or watching a anime for distraction. i slowly stopped eating, stopped leaving my bed. i just exist and it was painful. so painful to watch the world move around me while im still stuck in place. to see happy people or couples together and yet feel nothing but the air from the vents and the beating of my heart. and you. you were amazing. you loved me, tried to spoil me,cared for me, just wanted me and i ruined it. all because i feared you leaving. i feared that if i open up to you about how i feel, it would be over. because i knew deep down that a relationship was the last thing i needed. i knew that if i told you how my mental health truly was, it wouldve been over. so i kept it all to myself. i thought maybe it would get better or easier even. then i made a stupid decision that ended us anyway. i thought that maybe if i made you hate me then you would leave and find better. i hoped for you to see me slipping away from this world, to notice that im not okay. and idk if you did. so i went into a spiral and i went to a hb. i expressed these emotions and he quickly assumed that you were cheating. that if you couldn’t notice your own girlfriend mood change then it’s someone else. and that sickening saying and thought was put into my head over and over by many other friends. and i’m not blaming you, im not accusing you of cheating. im expressing my feelings ab you and your gbsf relationship. i didn’t like it. i didn’t like how close y’all were and how much you posted her, i didn’t like how you would talk to her about our problems or how you got her to text me about our relationship problems instead of yourself. so i turned to my boy bsf, flirting with him and he went along with it.. yet it took you awhile to notice, and when you did, when you left….. i finally felt something. i felt pain so deep inside that i couldn’t help but touch my chest. and it took me forever to realize that the cause of my actions resulted into someone i deeply loved being hurt. i became what i feared. i self sabotaged and pushed you away. so that night when you called and ended things, i completely broke. all i could manage was an okay but i wasn’t okay. and ik we will never be together again… but i just want you to know that i’m sorry juan. im so so sorry…you didn’t deserve anything i did to you, you deserve so much better and ik you will receive better. you stayed. even when i was so horrible and dry to you… im to blame for how things ended and i accept it. i just want you to come back to me….. but i also know that the love and trust that you had for me is long gone… so this is my last time talking to you, bothering you. you can hate me forever if you want. i just needed to finally get this out. better late than never ig

I can't move on knowing that what I did cannot be undone. The amount of guilt is trapping me in a cage making it inescapable on trying to achieve self improvement. I miss the comfort of your words, the warmth of your touch, and the steadiness around the world when your presence is near. I miss your words of affection, let it be through poems or paragraphs it will always have a place in my heart Liam. I hate myself for losing you and now I have no choice but to keep going or hope that maybe we'll be together again.

I love you!

I love you baby boobie... You know what, it's been a long time together and I still admire you like the starting days... I love youu... I don't know whyy but yes I do ... And so so so much. Despite all of the things that made me feel so vulnerable at the moment.. nothing could reduce my love for you... I really love you and want to live with you... You seem everything to me .. i love you 💋💋🦋 I can't live without you... My days don't pass without talking to you... I miss uhhh... Desire of meeting you always stays in my heart like a volcano as sometimes it looks too much but it's there all the times even when it's not actually looking like it is... I love you ❤️🤌

I miss you... I think of you every day... Do you still think of me...? Do clouds still make you think of me...? I can't apologise enough for the pain I caused you... I can't apologise enough for what I did... I just wish you didn't see me as a rapist... I wish you didn't have to cut me off... I wish we could restart... I don't know if you'll ever read this... I hope you don't... It would just fuck more things up... But if you do, just know that I would do, quite literally, anything to have you back in my life... I would move the sun if you would come back and talk to me... Maybe if we sit down and talk, you'd understand what happened... I love you... I always have and I always will... Til the day I die, I will continue to love you... My darling dove, you are the reason I stay on this planet... In hopes you will fly back to me... I love you...

Hey… I’ve never been particularly fluent in the language of affection, but maybe this is my only shot to say everything that’s been on my mind lately. Where do I start? Maybe by wishing you all a very happy Valentine’s Day. This marks my second valentine's flying solo but does that even matter? After all, every day already feels like valentine’s when I’ve got you guys in my corner. It’s kinda funny how I keep joking in the group chat about craving affection when in reality, that’s the one thing I’m not running on empty with you guys around. I’ve always been bad at mingling in group friendships, but this one just hits different in the best way. I love all of you <no exaggeration, no fine print> in a way that words can’t do justice. We might look like a low-maintenance friend group, but don’t get it twisted: I cherish you all more than I can properly explain. Whole heart, no half measures. If you’ve made it this far, congrats! You survived the cringe. But real talk, if I ever cross a line or make you uncomfortable, please call me out to my face. I’d much rather hear it straight than have you slowly fade away with no explanation. Because truth be told, I’m ride-or-die for this friendship and I want us to go the distance. That’s all. I hope you’re soaking up all the love you deserve today and always, and I hope you have a wonderful Valentine’s Day. I owo you!

kjvkjvkhkxkyxk

GODDAMN YOU WERE SO HOT

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I don’t understand my feelings. I just hate having them, hate feeling them. They make me feel vulnerable, make me feel like a horrible person. But maybe it’s not just a feeling — maybe it’s the reality, and it just hurts too much to admit. I thought I was better than that, but maybe that’s just what I try to convince myself of, just to help me stand up for myself. I hate everything about me, about trying to change but only imagining it — never truly making the change real. That’s why he left me, at least that’s how I see it. I promised him things I never did. I lied to his face just to have him. How could anyone call that love? But I did love him, I’m sure about that — at least I think I did. But still, I need to forget now, to move on from what we were, because we are nothing anymore. And it hurts so much knowing I destroyed everything before it was even built. Maybe I wasn’t made for that kind of relationship. Maybe it was just a sign telling me not to get involved romantically. At least that what I think. I mean, he knew it from the start and told me how it will be for him, for us. He told me the things he was afraid of, what could make him lose the spark. I knew — I knew literally everything. And I was there, making him feel confident, telling him I would make him forget those fears he had about us, only in the end to create even more. And I can only blame myself now, but at the same time I want to believe that no matter what we did, it would have ended the same — just to make myself feel a little better. Even though I knew, somehow, that no matter what, I would have ruined it. At least that’s my point of view. I heard someone say, “What’s not meant for you will disappoint you a thousand times until you understand.” And I believe it’s true, because I can’t count how many times he must have been disappointed in me. I think he knew he should let go — for us, for himself. And he did the right thing. At least that’s what I feel. Now he talks to someone else, and even if it’s not going as well as he wants, I hate seeing him try to get someone else’s attention. But at the same time, I think I’m kind of happy he didn’t stay stuck like me. I’m glad he’s not as foolish as I am, not understanding when something ends. And I can’t stop looking at his profile, asking myself thousands of questions, putting “what if” before every sentence. The worst is that I understand them. I understand him. This girl is so pretty, stylish, kind, funny, sweet to others. And how could I not understand, after being with him and still not succeeding in forgetting him? Maybe it’s hard for me to forget him because I’m not just trying to forget a person — I’m trying to forget the feelings I had for him and with him. The moments we shared, alone or with others. The words we exchanged to make each other feel safe. The memories — from the unforgettable ones to the quietest, smallest silences. What I’m trying to say is that the hardest part isn’t forgetting him. It’s forgetting this love we thought would never tear us apart. But it didn’t tear us apart — I did. At least that’s how it ended, if you ask me. In the end, I’m just trying to get over him as easily as he got over me — but without forgetting what we shared, and what I cherished.

I love you so much darling....I want us to get back together.....I miss you

Stay happy and healthy 🩷✨