Dear mahi, I don't know where to start but I am going to try my best so please bear with me. It started all the way back in 2024. I don't particularly remember the exact events which led us to becoming friends but I remember some moments vividly; me helping you pass your chemistry exam, hearing you swear in korean and us taking the bus back home. I have told you this before but thank you for being there even if you didn't know anything because you being there helped me get home a little more unhurt each day. Talking to you on my way back quickly became a comforting feeling I looked forward to. Fast forward and we became good friends. I told you parts of everything and you were nothing but the most supportive and loving person I had known. None of us bring up our conversations back from that time, but not a day goes by that I don't think about them. It was truly magical. You were my precious and I was your princess. It was and always will be one of the most happiest times of my life. I loved talking to you so much that I could barely ever contain all that joy within me. I would jump and giggle when you said something that you would call 🧀. It was the origin of the iconic pea pod and frankie. Back then when I was still navigating through all that, you came in and made me feel beautiful and worthy again. You would always compliment me and make me feel so loved. One day, it all stopped. Fast forward to the 8th of July 2024, you went ice skating with our friends and I was having not the best day, but right when all hells were about to break loose, I get a text from you, then some more videos and pictures. I started laughing through tears in my eyes and forgot the gravity of the situation I was in just moments ago. You didn't stop there, and kept talking to me the whole time when you were there, because of which our friends still bring it up now and then. We went on a walk that day and you came home. And then the moment happened. Something that still warms me up when I remember it. I hugged you. I let my body just rest against yours, my head on your shoulder and my palms gripping onto your shirt. I was scared of letting you go. Those arms are one of the most safest places I have been in. I just wanted to bury my face in your shoulder and hide away from the world, only feeling enveloped by your presence. I came to your house and till date, I believe your parents are some of the nicest people I have seen. I don't want to get into alot of details because I have mentioned it quite often to you but I felt so loved that day that I burst out into tears as soon as I reached back home. Then, we went through a silent phase as we both got into university. I added your location to my home screen weather. If the day looked gloomy there, I would look up at the sky and wish for the clouds to clear up quicker because you didn't like them. I had a crush on you back then too, but you liked someone else then. And then everything else happened and now it feels like a whole different relationship then what it was 2 years back. It is normal and I do not expect us to remain the same but boy do I miss it. I can't tell you directly but it hurts me every time you ship me with someone else as I am sitting right there madly in love with you. I ship you with others too, purely to cope. I have been trying to go about this in every logical way I can but I really cannot stop liking you mahi. I thought about you mentioning how long distance relationships aren't really your thing, and you mentioning about wanting a kid someday which I am not sure if I can or cannot do. You have mentioned about how you and your dad talked about the importance of marrying into a good family too, and while you never said this directly since you are a single child, marriage could be a way you could get a brother or a sister, which again in my situation is just a huge mess. All these logical reasons, but I still cannot stop liking you. You are my phone password. I have a pinterest board for you named "my secret muse" and I have a playlist of songs which I know you listen to so that I can listen to them on those days I miss you a little extra hard. This one might be weird but I have a project dedicated to you on chatgpt too. I have written you handwritten letters which you will probably never read. It feels too daunting to say that 4 letter word so I will rather use a milder version of it instead. I like you mahi, I really do. Your droopy eyes which I can never maintain eye contact with, those heart shaped lips of yours which always seem to know the right thing to say and those arms of yours which calm me down, I love all of it. I really do. Please stop shipping me with other people mahi, it hurts my heart more than I would like to admit. Your birthday is coming up soon my love, and I hope your 20s brings you lots of happiness and health. Thank you for being the reason I get through long nights because I want to spend one more day loving you silently. 🫪🌾🫂🌘🇬🇧