martin, i wish you could see me. somehow i keep on losing people in my life and i feel as if no one sees me for who i am. my intentions are always misunderstood and fundamentally, nobody knows me as a person. my true interests, my beliefs, its a lost cause. but i know you would. you would understand even if you couldn’t understand. and this is why i miss you the most. i cant even express myself fully in words but with you, i dont have to. i have changed alot, and i am stable now. i am happy and content now. even if it seems as if things come crashing down around me. i dont waver. i hope you’re proud of that tin. ive really tried my best to get there. and im okay with it. im quite proud of myself, i havent told anyone this before. i believe you’d be too. i miss you martin, and i love you endlessly and eternally. yours always, nova