Hey! I've been through a lot lately but overtime it help me to cope up with the things you failed to see before; That there are people who somehow manage you to let your walls open. I realized that you built those high walls before not because you wanted people around you to climb onto it to see the deep of your existence but rather letting them know the possibilities that you can somehow let them in without trying to climb to your walls. You just needed something like an assurance to open those yourself. For the past years, many things have changed. I collected many awards into simultaneous competitions and soon felt that satisfaction you've been craving since your very fresh start which you are very scared to face and uphold. I learned how crucial it is for me to make a mistake that could lead me into knowing more about the things through my wrongdoings. I meet new companions who can understand all my whims and attitude- something that most people during your time couldn't distinguish. I became fully independent in a way that being only yourself inside the room wherein new individuals you haven't interacted with seems so normal now, strangely normal from the way how you felt way back before that you wanted someone to be with you. I know how to interact functionally with other people and slowly leaving the dark place that once serves as your comfort and slowly learning how to fight with your social anxiety. I finally figured out what I really wanted to be in the near future- something that keeps you insane before because you wanted to become a multi professional in every field you ambition. And lastly, I finally become a journalist for four-consecutive years now, even reaching one of the highest positions in every club (that which I know you'll be very proud because you used to look up those before). And yet, I've been having a hard time dropping it due to the expectations around me, but I badly wanted to untangle myself away from journalism because I know my journey being a campus journalist have finally come to an end even though I was trying to keep moving thinking that maybe I'm just scared but no, that I must sail away because I felt that something is calling me and I need to condition myself for that because years may have slowly soon become a fragments of memory but one thing hasn't been changed and it's the eagerness to explore more about yourself. I knew that because I can still feel your presence that lingers inside. I am still you. Just a redefined and complex version I have outgrown by having you still.